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<title>if you think we deserve happiness, i'll believe you by ernyx</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29265156">if you think we deserve happiness, i'll believe you</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ernyx/pseuds/ernyx'>ernyx</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Romanogers fics (for ease of finding) [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616, Marvel Cinematic Universe</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Fluff, Gentle Kissing, Gossip, Happy Ending, Implied Sexual Content, News Media, Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 13:33:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>944</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29265156</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ernyx/pseuds/ernyx</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>They can’t pretend any longer that this is casual. Every breath that rattles through them makes them shake with the knowledge that they could have lost each other, that they should have taken advantage of what they had before that. It’s stupid, they get injured often enough, even come close to death often enough, but something about seeing the other one like this... </p><p>Natasha has always been helpless to the power of Steve Rogers. The rest of the world is too, why shouldn’t she be?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Romanogers fics (for ease of finding) [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/938634</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>93</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>if you think we deserve happiness, i'll believe you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>crossposted from my tumblr<br/>the prompt from notafossil was for our muses spooning, and I got a little carried away with backstory for it</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     She’s resigned herself to this from the start. He’ll always be the one who is in the spotlight, the one who has to be extra conscious of his image because he’s a public figure, the one who has to bear the weight of the world on his shoulders. She’ll always be the one lurking in the shadows, the one who will draw askance glances from anyone and everyone because of her reputation, the one who will be the quiet support in the background. Her burdens are not any more or less, they are simply different. Their <em>lives</em> are very different, despite so much overlap. </p><p>     They disguise their dating as an increasingly close friendship, just barely skirting the boundaries of what would be acceptable in public. Without the safety of walls around them, they don’t do more than kiss cheeks, link arms, lean on each other slightly. That is enough to send the rumor mill running, but it’s all little unsubstantiated things, and the paparazzi get largely bored of it soon enough. </p><p>     But then comes the day of the battle. The two of them, dangerously close to death, reach out to each other with desperate arms and even more desperate lips. They can’t pretend any longer that this is <em>casual</em>. Every breath that rattles through them makes them shake with the knowledge that they could have lost each other, that they should have taken advantage of what they had before that. It’s <em>stupid</em>, they get injured often enough, even come close to death often enough, but something about seeing the other one like this... </p><p>     Natasha has always been helpless to the power of Steve Rogers. The rest of the world is too, why shouldn’t she be? She falls into him and kisses him recklessly. </p><p>     The battle makes the front page, and <em>they</em> make the third. There is gossip abound, suspicions about what she’s <em>done</em> to him, how she’s <em>corrupted</em> him, why he’d <em>deign</em> to be with someone so <em>heartless.</em> Surely she’s to blame. Surely he’s deluded, or worse, poisoned. <em>Captain America With Russian Spy</em> reads tabloids. <em>The Death of Patriotism in a Kiss.</em> She doesn’t read it. <em>Who Will Save The Captain?</em> It’s rubbish, but it’s everywhere. Slander never sleeps, and the tabloids have a field day... week... <em>month.</em> </p><p>     If it bothers Nat, she doesn’t say a word about it. She becomes a little more careful in public, curls up a little closer to him when they’re in private. Steve knows, of <em>course</em> he knows, and finally he reaches for her hand when they’re at one of the little quiet bars they visit from time to time. She looks at him with the tiniest frown when he presses a kiss to her knuckles. </p><p>     “Can we stop the charade?” he asks quietly. </p><p>     She stiffens, taking a deep breath. Is this rejection? Has it been too much? She wouldn’t blame him, it’s a lot of pressure to deal with both threats to the world <em>and</em> the pressure of public opinion on your private life. </p><p>     But it’s the opposite. He tugs her gently off the bar stool next to him, slots his lips onto hers, and kisses her gentle and slow and in full view of anyone else who wants to see. She sighs into it, and when she pulls away, her eyes are suspiciously bright. Her head drops forward onto his shoulder and she lets out a breathy laugh. </p><p>     “I never could win with you, Rogers,” she says, and laces her hand into his. <em>This</em> is where she belongs, where she feels like she has a place in the world, and she’s so <em>grateful.</em> </p><p>     “Come on,” he smiles, tugging her to his side, closing out there tab with a hand wave and quiet word. “Let’s go home, shall we?” </p><p>     She barely remembers the ride back, too busy staring at him, their hands still twined together as they sit in the back of the cab. He really isn’t letting her go, even with the media circus, even with the better part of the world telling him that she’s not the right person for him. Natasha cannot help but admire the strength of his conviction for the thousandth time. </p><p>     They end up back at his apartment, folding themselves into bed gently, and then all at once they’re eager hands and mouths and <em>want</em> in a way that they’ve been wanting to do for ages. It’s not their first time, but it feels like the beginning all over again. They laugh between kisses, gasp between touches, rock together in perfect harmony, like this is their proper place in the universe. It <em>is</em>, after all. </p><p>     When they collapse, sweaty and sated, several hours later, Natasha finds herself pulled back against his chest, arms tight around her. It should make her uncomfortable, she thinks, not to have her hands free at all times to reach for a weapon. It should make her uncomfortable to be sleeping facing a window without someone between it and her. It should make her uncomfortable that there’s someone who loves her like this, and lets her feel so heartbreakingly human. But it doesn’t, it <em>doesn’t</em>, and she wakes just the same way that she fell asleep, not a nightmare in sight. </p><p>     In the morning light, Natasha gives in. She loves without reservation. She finds every excuse to touch him. She smiles at him when they’re working, scoots close enough to him during Fury’s meeting to place a hand gently on his knee, tackles him for a well-deserved break and drags him away to get coffee. Steve laughs (and laughs, and laughs). </p><p>     She’s <em>happy</em>. They both are, and for once, they might just feel like they deserve it.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading! As always, kudos and comments are love. Feedback and fic ideas are welcome!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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